Where I've Been

 Whew, where did April go? It's May, my big Two-O birthday is coming up and summer is coming on full-blast!

Since April has flown past without a chance for me to write, let's take a moment to revisit.

1) April was sprinkled with my younger  brother's (can't call him my "little" brother any more) baseball games. Micah has been playing in a homeschool league for the past three years. I always enjoy watching him play.

2) I teach piano to three students and had a co-recital in April with my good friend, Bethany. My students made me so proud!

Bethany and I

My students and I

3) My sister, brother-in-law and three nieces moved here for a little while. My days have been richly filled with colored picture-gifts, searches for shoes, hair-ties, hugs and kisses, no-no's, walks outside and tickling fights. :)

The Birthday girl

The Almost-Five-Year-Old

The Baby

3) My big brother was ordained to go on the mission field with his wife, Sarah!! On the spur of the moment, Caleb and I re-learned The Lord's Prayer in three days and played a violin-piano duet at his ordination service. That was crazy fun!

4) Last but not least, at the end of April/beginning of May my family traveled down to Florida to see Micah in the Homeschool World Series. It was great to see him play and wonderful to have a mini-vacation. This was my first trip to FL and I enjoyed it immensely!

Marvelous sunset

My first view of the Gulf!

Stunning ocean-life

April was full of fast-paced fun but now I'm looking forward to some slow summer May days. :)

What did you do this past April?

Instead...

There is a struggle of emotions that goes on in me when I look ahead to Thanksgiving. I am naturally pessimistic, not that I necessarily look for bad things to happen - though I certainly try to be prepared for them - but more often than not I see the bad rather than the good in my life. It is a terrible habit but, there it is.

Right now I am tempted to look at my dad's unemployment struggle instead of seeing how God has faithfully taken care of us through it all.

 I want to feel sorry for myself when I see how my family is spread out across the whole world, instead of thanking God for how close our hearts still are.

I want to mourn the loss of my grandparents instead of shouting for joy at the knowledge that they are in heaven!

But God has been cultivating a spirit of thankfulness instead of fear in me this year. He has opened my eyes to see His overwhelming goodness and faithful love. I am forever grateful. Or at least I should be!

This year -
~ I have been surrounded by people who love me.
~ I have regained my health.
~ I have spent time with my entire family, together.
~ My grandfather has come through two dangerous operations.
~ I made two amazing trips to Russia.
~ I have learned that money and health insurance do not take care of us. God does.
~ I have discovered what a great blessing it is to be so intimately connected with my siblings' ministries.
~ I have cried and struggled through many difficult things and been carried through it all by the Everlasting Arms.
~ God has allowed me to have a positive impact in childrens' lives.
~ God has taught me what true humility looks like.
~ I have been overwhelmed by Jesus' vast love for me!

Havin' Me A Think

Well, you will be happy to know I have NOT dropped off the face of the earth!....You ARE glad, right? *wink*

Nope, I am still alive and well! I have just been taking some time off to have me a think. (That's Southern talk in case you didn't know and are completely shocked at my terrible grammar.) I didn't actually know that's why I was taking time off, because at first I just didn't have any inspiration or will to write, except in my good 'ole journal of course. (Okay maybe I'm a terrible Southerner but now even I am sick of my fake accent.) But after a week or two I realized God had some things to teach me and it was time for me to be quiet for a while.

Now my itch to write has returned and I have never been so happy to "scratch" it. I was beginning to think it was gone for good!

With this fresh start you may have noticed my new look. I was appalled when I returned to see how limp my blog looked. I think this look is much more fun and represents my personality better. To be honest, I think the reason I had to take a break was because it was getting waaaay too stuffy on here! Or maybe I was trying to force myself to fit a stuffy personality. (Maybe it was just all in my head *smile* That's probably closer to the truth.)

To sum up, I had a very good break but I am very happy to be back!

Life Happens

Hello! I'm sure you've all been wondering what in the world has happened to me! No, I'm not dead or even sick. To put it simply, Life Happened!

I think I mentioned a few weeks ago that my schedule was going to start getting very full soon. Well, soon has arrived! This past week has been just about the craziest of my life. Normally I would chalk that up as a good thing; I love hustle and bustle and being smack in the middle of everything. And though it certainly hasn't been bad, this past week has definitely run me ragged.

(Am I making any sense?)

Let me give you an idea of my week.

        Monday (the12th): Our first Good News Club meeting! I was so nervous about this because we'd had some bumps in the road before so I was anxious to do it just right! Thankfully it went very smoothly and everyone was happy.

      

         Tuesday: I taught two piano lessons. I enjoy those so much. I have only recently discovered a passion for teaching that I never knew I had, and not just music lessons either!

       

         Wednesday: One of the craziest days of the crazy week! At 8:30 in the morning we left to meet friends at the lake and spent the early afternoon tubing and skiing. 

(There are not many things on my list of pleasures that top riding in the bow of a boat. It combines my love of colors and nature and sky and water and wind all in one delightful experience.)

At about 3 o'clock we had to rush home to get ready for AWANA that evening. It was another hectic night, but it was still great! I look forward to Wednesday nights as the highlight of my week.

         

        Thursday: I woke up early to walk with a friend. It was good to get some exercise and talk. I had planned to visit another family but after my fast-paced day before I really needed just one day to stay home and chill. It was delightful.

        

         Friday: I spent the day shopping with my mom and younger sister. We really get crazy when we're together; those two bring out the silly side of me.

          Saturday: I woke up at 6AM to go to the AWANA training conference. It was long, but fun to hang out with fellow AWANA  leaders.

            Sunday: This Sunday was Celebration Sunday! Every third Sunday in September we celebrate our church's anniversary! It is a wonderful day full of music, fellowship and food! My family partners with another family to organize the meal part of the day. 

This year we had the privilege of having the Peach State Quartet come sing for us! I didn't get to sit in for all of it, I had to go help prepare for the meal, but what I did hear was simply beautiful.

So maybe you can understand my prolonged absence and if you can't well, I'm sorry! Truly, I am sorry to fall behind like this. Not just for you, but for me! I like keeping up this blog, thinking up interesting posts, practicing my blogging skills (or lack thereof). *wink*

Thank you for your patience with me!

Blessings

A dear friend from church sang this song yesterday in church. Tears were streaming down my face as she sang.

   

Last week was very rough. My grandfather has been in and out of doctor's offices since his pacemaker was put in. 

Another close friend found out her grandfather's cancer has returned.

And then we received some devastating news about a family friend.

So, I've spent much of this week in tears, particularly this weekend.

When Ms. Melissa got up to sing and explained how this song had touched her, I knew I was about to become a basket-case. But I still wasn't prepared for how deeply the song would touch me. But it was okay, they were good tears, tears of His own healing. 

I pray this song brings healing to you as well.

Graters and Gratefulness

Have you ever swallowed a cheese grater? No? Well, if you had you'd know exactly how my throat felt on  Friday.

Friday morning I crawled out of bed with a throat sore enough to rival the the my tonsillitis throat's record. I tried everything I'd ever heard of to find relief that day, warm tea with honey, plain honey, gargling vinegar-water, throat drops...the whole shebang. The only thing that helped  to any degree was two Tylenol, but still, tears came to my eyes and I tensed all over with the pain of swallowing anything.

I was mildly upset with God for throwing such a wrench in my plans. I felt even worse when I heard of the plans the others had made to pass out fliers at a mosque and eat out for dinner - plans I would have to miss out on to nurse my throat. I even wondered (somewhat bitterly) if these germs had slipped past when God wasn't looking (can we say drama queen?). But in the back of my head, or deep in my heart, or wherever, I knew God that must have some reason for letting this happen to me. So, not having much else to do or being too miserable to do it, I started trying to sort out what it might be.

I suddenly realized that it had never occurred to me to thank God for a healthy throat before. Then I began thinking about all the blessings I take for granted (sometimes even while complaining to God for not blessing me in other ways!). And not just the "common" things like life, clothes, food shelter but extra-special things like: 
~a homey house with a large yard,
~amazing friends,
~a beautiful town,
~spending money,
~a quiet neighborhood,
~music,
~parents who understand me,
~brothers and sisters who like me,
~a church that cares about me individually
.
...I began to see my life in a different light and I saw all the things I could and should be overwhelmed by gratefulness for....I was disgusted with myself but I still wasn't all that grateful...

I still haven't gotten to the point of being overwhelmed but, while I think gratefulness is actually a gift from God, I do think it also comes partly from discipline. So, as an exercise I have decided to pledge to post once a week with at least one thing I am truly grateful for. This post will take place on Fridays so check back on me!

Another way you can help me is to be praying for me, that this lesson will not slide off with time but will become etched on my heart and transform me and that God would take this weakness of mine to show off His own strength.

"Praise to the Lord
Who o'er all things so wonderfully reigneth
Shelters the under His wings
Yea, so gently sustaineth.
Hast thou not seen, how thy desires e'er have been
Granted in what He ordaineth?"

Thou who hast given so much to me, give me one more thing... a grateful heart!         

~George Herbert 

What I've Been Up To

So, my brother and sister-in-law left a week ago today. I've been trying and trying to get this post out....it's been more difficult than it should be. I guess it stirs up a lot of emotions that I usually try to avoid and when I'm emotional I don't trust my writing. So let's just say it's been very hard, I miss them a whole lot but God is taking care of me...and them!

I have been keeping very busy since they left. While they were here I tried not to be too busy so I would be free to spend time with them. But in the week since they left (it seems like MUCH longer) I've taken apart our sewing room, watched Bleak House, had a visit from a friend, made pickles, run various errands, read a few books, cleaned and rearranged my room and written a lot.

Speaking of writing, the other day (when I was cleaning my room) I decided to go through my mounds of papers and organize them into a binder. I'm always writing and I prefer loose-leaf to notebooks so it can get pretty messy sometimes. Besides, I didn't want any papers to get lost. Someday I want to write a book and what I write now will be the foundation for it.

So, I started gathering my piles and sorting through them, adding them to the binder as I went along. I was getting excited as I worked. My papers were adding up. Some of them didn't have much written on them, just a thought or an idea. But some of them were solid writings and all of them were important. By the time I was done I could hardly close the binder. I was so excited. 

You see, ever since I graduated and even before I've struggled with feelings of pointlessness. I thought that my life would "begin" after high-school. I envisioned running hither and thither doing ministry work, meeting new people and working with girls. And yet none of that has happened. For the most part nothing has changed since high-school.

So, I was really excited to have tangible proof that this past year has not been pointless. I have been productive! God has been working in me!I have worked and sweated and cried and trusted and cried and waited and cried and...you get the picture. I have learned so very much. As my mom likes to tell me I've been in "God's College". Learning straight from The Teacher Himself.

Maybe this seems like bragging to you, but I only tell you this to encourage you if you are now or are ever in a situation like me. Don't fear. God has a specific purpose for you. Remember, He chose you! (John 15:16) Just trust Him to do the work in you.

Any comments and/or criticisms?

Update

Sorry about the smattering of posts lately...May has been the absolute busiest month of the year so far. In the last month or so we

1) painted our kitchen cabinets (I told you about that)

2) my oldest sister and her family came for a good, long visit 

3) we had the last AWANA night at our church for the year

4) we went camping with my whole family down near Savannah (that's      15 people in case you were wondering)

5) I took the SAT (finally)

6) we had three guests in the house (along with the 8 other people living in the house)

7) we packed my brother and SIL's container for their move to Africa, 

8) three of my friends graduated, 

9) one friend got married (Hurray!)

10) oh, and I had a birthday. :D 

(That's only the big stuff by the way!)

So, now maybe you understand why I haven't been around much lately! Life still is busy, (when is it not?), but it has slowed a bit, enough for us to catch our breath, take a small break and fold the laundry! (Just kidding.) Here are some picture-memories from this last month:

Feels like The Waltons!

My niece by the lake

Camping!

The salt marsh by our campground. The vastness of it awed me, especially when I remembered that God's love for me is even bigger!!

For as high as the heavens are above the earth,

So great is His lovingkindness toward those who fear Him.

 As far as the east is from the west,

So far has He removed our transgressions from us.

 Just as a father has compassion on his children,

So the LORD has compassion on those who fear Him.

 For He Himself knows our frame;

He is mindful that we are but dust.

 As for man, his days are like grass;

As a flower of the field, so he flourishes.

When the wind has passed over it, it is no more,

And its place acknowledges it no longer.

But the lovingkindness of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him,

And His righteousness to children’s children,

To those who keep His covenant

And remember His precepts to do them.

Psalm 103:11-18