Always...

God is good.

I was thinking that last night as I stared up at a spotlight-rivaling full moon peeking through the trees. My heart was completely full of praise because right now, my life is absolutely perfect. A full moon was like a triple cherry on my sundae. But then a thought struck me.

Hasn't God always been good?

The obvious answer is, "Yes, of course! God is always good!!"

Then how come you've never felt this blessed before now?

Well...because life hasn't always been this wonderful. My teenage years were very full of tears and struggles, big questions and doubts and deep grief. That probably sounds dramatic considering nothing particularly tragic happened to me but my feelings were real nonetheless. The point is, I didn't feel blessed back then. Instead I often felt forgotten. Forsaken. Unloved.

But I wasn't.

Last night that realization came home to me. God has always, always been just as good as (and even more than!) I know Him to be right now! He has always loved me more than my craziest dreams can envision. He has always crafted every particle of my life to draw me closer to Him. Even my most painful, dark, lonely moments have been expressions of His tenderest love guiding, growing and teaching me.

My life won't always be as full of joy as it is right now. Something I have learned is that, no matter who or where you are, life will be full of pain and joy. That's why I want to hold on to what I am learning right now, let it sink in deep, so that when the darkness overtakes the day again I can look up and remember that I am just as blessed, just as loved as I know I am tonight.

The same is true for you.

Welcome 2012!!!

It's 2012!!! Isn't it funny how things feel different and yet still the same after New Year's Day?

Today someone asked me if I was excited about the new year. At first I didn't think I was, New Year's Eve is probably at the bottom of my list of holidays in order of preference. I cringe at the idea of changing something I am comfortable in, even if it is as simple as one number at the end of a date.

But now, as I reflect a little bit, I find that I am excited about 2012.

Even though it has already come, for the first few days of the new year I always feel like I'm standing in a blank space between the old year and the new one, sifting through memories like old photographs and forming ideas of what I should expect from the year ahead.

As I look back I see how wonderfully blessed I have been in everything, and I don't say that lightly. There has been pain this year: in a friend suddenly turning their back on me, in my brother moving to Madagascar, in a family I know and love falling apart, in a prolonged struggle with depression. But now I can see how God has carried me through every single one of these situations and I shake my head in awe.

How can I fear what lies ahead when Jesus has so faithfully and patiently showed me again and again:

 "Jenna, I love you. 

Jenna I will always take care of you

Jenna, I will never leave you.

Jenna, I delight in you.

Jenna, I grieve with you.

Jenna, I am changing you.

Jenna, I will come for you.

Jenna, I will never change.

Jenna, I can handle the world Myself!"

(Grin Yeah, sometimes I get overzealous and try to take over God's job, but He is really good about letting me know that He is capable and He is taking care of not only me, but the people I love as well!)

"But now, thus says the LORD, your Creator, O Jacob, 

And He who formed you, O Israel, 

'Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; 

I have called you by name; you are Mine! 

'When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; 

And through the rivers, they will not overflow you. 

When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, 

Nor will the flame burn you.'" 

Isaiah 43:1-2

If the LORD had not been my help, 

My soul would soon have dwelt in the abode of silence. 
 If I should say, “My foot has slipped,” 
Your lovingkindness, O LORD, will hold me up. 
When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, 
Your consolations delight my soul. 

Psalm 94:17-19

So, in view of all of that: Welcome 2012!!! I am excited to see what God will do in me this year! I am excited about the people I will meet, the things I will learn, how I will grow, the opportunities Jesus is preparing for me, even the things that will change! 

For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you [and me!] will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

Philippians 1:6

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

Romans 8:28

Campaign

Christmas is nearly upon us! These past few weeks have been a flurry of activity..though not necessarily with Christmas preparations.

For the last week or two I've been involved in a local campaign. I had an amazing time hanging out with my hometown friends and making new friends from as far away as South Dakota!

 I am very happy to announce our victory! Mike Crane was elected to the Georgia state senate on December 6th.

 I was very impressed with the integrity and passion for Jesus I found in the young adults I worked with during this campaign. They inspired me and challenged me to be more intentional in how I live out my faith in Jesus. And even though most of the out-of-town people were long-time friends, they accepted us newcomers and made us part of their group.

All the memories I have made, in just a few days! Hanging around a campfire swapping stories and singing. Walking in the parade. Laughter. Hugs. Singing praise after the victory announcement! Sad goodbyes...Promises to stay in touch. Memories I will treasure forever.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

(Pssst, if you poke around Mike Crane's website you'll find some pictures and videos of us.)

Our game of Ultimate Frisbee...in the rain.

After a while, not being dressed to play in the rain, I appointed myself official photographer...from the car. :)

Praise the LORD! Oh, give thanks to the LORD, for He is good! For His mercy endures forever.
Psalm 106:1

Instead...

There is a struggle of emotions that goes on in me when I look ahead to Thanksgiving. I am naturally pessimistic, not that I necessarily look for bad things to happen - though I certainly try to be prepared for them - but more often than not I see the bad rather than the good in my life. It is a terrible habit but, there it is.

Right now I am tempted to look at my dad's unemployment struggle instead of seeing how God has faithfully taken care of us through it all.

 I want to feel sorry for myself when I see how my family is spread out across the whole world, instead of thanking God for how close our hearts still are.

I want to mourn the loss of my grandparents instead of shouting for joy at the knowledge that they are in heaven!

But God has been cultivating a spirit of thankfulness instead of fear in me this year. He has opened my eyes to see His overwhelming goodness and faithful love. I am forever grateful. Or at least I should be!

This year -
~ I have been surrounded by people who love me.
~ I have regained my health.
~ I have spent time with my entire family, together.
~ My grandfather has come through two dangerous operations.
~ I made two amazing trips to Russia.
~ I have learned that money and health insurance do not take care of us. God does.
~ I have discovered what a great blessing it is to be so intimately connected with my siblings' ministries.
~ I have cried and struggled through many difficult things and been carried through it all by the Everlasting Arms.
~ God has allowed me to have a positive impact in childrens' lives.
~ God has taught me what true humility looks like.
~ I have been overwhelmed by Jesus' vast love for me!

Happy Birthday Mom!

Happy Birthday Mom!!!

This week I am grateful for: My Mom :)

My mom is my very best friend. (Seriously!)

The only person in the world I feel free to tell absolutely anything to.

Things I love about my Mother:

She always thinks of others first.

She loves taking care of people.

She gives me hugs.

She likes to be with me.

She listens to me.

She is wise.

She knows and understands me better than anyone else on earth.

She loves Jesus.

She is patient.

She is always kind.

She is hardworking.

She is fun!

Who can find a virtuous wife?

      For her worth is far above rubies.        The heart of her husband safely trusts her;       So he will have no lack of gain.         She does him good and not evil       All the days of her life.         She seeks wool and flax,       And willingly works with her hands.         She is like the merchant ships,       She brings her food from afar.         She also rises while it is yet night,       And provides food for her household,       And a portion for her maidservants.         She considers a field and buys it;       From her profits she plants a vineyard.         She girds herself with strength,       And strengthens her arms.         She perceives that her merchandise is good,       And her lamp does not go out by night.        She stretches out her hands to the distaff,       And her hand holds the spindle.         She extends her hand to the poor,       Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.         She is not afraid of snow for her household,       For all her household is clothed with scarlet.         She makes tapestry for herself;       Her clothing is fine linen and purple.         Her husband is known in the gates,       When he sits among the elders of the land.         She makes linen garments and sells them,       And supplies sashes for the merchants.         Strength and honor are her clothing;       She shall rejoice in time to come.         She opens her mouth with wisdom,       And on her tongue is the law of kindness.         She watches over the ways of her household,       And does not eat the bread of idleness.         Her children rise up and call her blessed;       Her husband also, and he praises her:        “ Many daughters have done well,       But you excel them all.”         Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,       But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.        Give her of the fruit of her hands,       And let her own works praise her in the gates.

(Well, Blogger is acting a little strange. I tried to get the Scripture passage above to be centered and it came out like this! But ya know, I kind of like it! :D )

Things that Make Me Smile

Surprises (good ones!)

Real mail

Laimon Fresh (Long story...)

Baptisms

Megamind

Listening to Nickel Creek (although sometimes it makes me cry too.)

A phone call from my big brother.

A comment on my blog. (hint, hint)

Spending time with my oldest sister (a rare treat)

Memories of my grandmother. (sometimes that makes me cry too..)

My brother's saaad jokes. *smile* (<-- see? I told you so.)

My nieces' antics and funny sayings.

Hugging my 93-year-old grandfather.

Wearing my favorite dress.

Cozy days.

Sunshine (It makes everything beautiful!)

Southern courtesy (a.k.a. chatting with a complete stranger just because you're in the same line.)

Weddings

Happy Endings

And much more! I expect you’re yawning right about now though so I’ll cut it short. 

Weather

This week I am grateful for: Wonderful weather!!!

I know all there are terrible storms ravaging the upper and lower east coast, but here in GA we are enjoying the loveliest weather we've had in a long time. We've received the rain we prayed for, earlier in the week, while yesterday and today we've been soaking up the sun during a much-needed break from the humidity and heat.

And it looks as if it will continue! According to weather.com our temps will be in the 80s for at least another week! (Perhaps we will ease right into fall this year instead of swinging back and forth between indian summer and autumn.)

Thank you Jesus!

Blessings

A dear friend from church sang this song yesterday in church. Tears were streaming down my face as she sang.

   

Last week was very rough. My grandfather has been in and out of doctor's offices since his pacemaker was put in. 

Another close friend found out her grandfather's cancer has returned.

And then we received some devastating news about a family friend.

So, I've spent much of this week in tears, particularly this weekend.

When Ms. Melissa got up to sing and explained how this song had touched her, I knew I was about to become a basket-case. But I still wasn't prepared for how deeply the song would touch me. But it was okay, they were good tears, tears of His own healing. 

I pray this song brings healing to you as well.